Encore Ici..

I have the feeling that for the past couple weeks, this blog has become a black hole of nothingness. Perhaps this is because nothing much has broken my routine of buying cheese, drinking coffee, practicing, ad infinitum.
Although I've just had several glasses of hard cider and a rum cocktail (it's "Epiphany" here, which is some sort of holiday), here's everything I've learned over the past few weeks that I've been too lazy to post:

1. Prague is like Disneyland, and more in a "drinking alone on Pleasure Island" way than "eye-popping orgasm on Space Mountain" way. The pretty parts are all in the center of town, which must have the most souvenir shops per capita than any city in the world.
On that note, who the hell buys that stuff? Laughing electronic witches? A "Prague Drinking Team" sweatshirt? It's like the yard-sale from hell, and trust me, I've seen some miserable yard-sales.
Now imagine Disneyland is in the middle of East Germany. As soon as you leave your lovely tourist cocoon, you're in a world of graffiti, trams, and the need to hide your true thoughts behind a facade of nonchalance.
I discovered this underbelly of Prague because of my insistence to stay in a hostel and be "social," versus Philip's desire to stay in a hotel and be "comfortable." Misreading the hostel website, I accidentally booked us an apartment rental service in a "gritty" (the word used by my Prague city guide) suburb of Prague, which left us a 25 minute walk from the center. Our breakfast consisted of a few slices of American cheese and a juicebox. Philip has not spoken to me since.
If I give the impression that I did not enjoy Prague, it is wrong--I just have that feeling that I did not discover the "real" Prague, if such a thing exists. It is still an excellent city with a soaring castle, a cool bridge, excellent brews, heavy dumplings, and lots of empty casinos. I mean really, totally empty casinos.

2. A girl took me on a moped spin through Paris a few nights ago. I felt like James Bond. Except the girl was driving. And I was on a moped.

3. Said girl cannot hang out again until the 20th (precise date named), due to exams. This is either an excuse, or the most studious girl in the world. Probably the former. To be determined.

4. Said "Epiphany" holiday here involves eating lots of almond-flavored cakes and hoping that you find the "feve" in yours--basically a little plastic figurine, which means you get to wear a crown and be "king" for the day.
I have eaten four cakes in the last twelve hours and have not won. In general, finding the "feve" has usually been an accurate indicator of how the year will go. Since I have yet to ever win, I guess I can expect more of the same this year.
Why can't I just be king for once? Just once?

5. The French kid next to me is screaming because "World of Warcraft" froze on him. I've rarely seen anyone so angry. I don't know much about this game, but please just stay away from it.

6. Spending New Year's in a gay bar in the Marais (I didn't know it was gay, I promise...*wink wink*...no, I actually really didn't, seriously) and going to bed by 2AM is actually a more enjoyable way to spend the day than being forced to dance at an unknown person's house in the Parisian suburbs until 5:30 AM.

7. Spending 5 hours in a cafe and watching "Gone Baby Gone" is the perfect way to spend New Year's Day, minus the "Gone Baby Gone" part.

8. Christmas pudding still tastes like goose asshole.

School starts up again on Tuesday! Not that I'll really be able to tell the difference.
Here's to the second trimester of this zany (and often totally uneventful) French adventure.